Happy Birthday, Crazy Diamond*
It seems to me that I've been obsessed with him. Interestingly, I have never even listened to any of his solo compositions/performances or albums. And yet, his schizophrenia fascinates me all the while. I ask myself: why? And perhaps the answer lies in memory or the lack of it!
Personally, I have always remembered many a small thing, things that do not matter to anyone else; soemtimes, I remember each word said by a person (if that person matter to me), words said in "reflection", words not meant, and then when that person breaks his/her words, I feel devastated, I feel violated.
For the other person, on the other hand, it was not an issue at all; he/she never even meant what he/she said, to being with.
I guess, that is my curse; my memory, that is!
In retrospect, it seems to me that I have never forgiven anyone who has gone back on one's words. And I believe, it will be at the best of my (and their) interest that one day I will forget who said what to me and who broke which promise.
And then I will be able to forgive everyone and be at peace with myself. The redemption thus seems to lie in my forgetting!
And such thoughts bring me back to him.... Oh, how I envy him!
*Syd Barrett, Born on 6th January, 1946.
